Alarm Clock!

Everyone Up!

These days it seems that my life purpose is being an alarm clock.  My day is run by the soft sounds of the second's hand ticking away and I'm tired.

You would think that by the time your kids hit their teenage years you'd be over that.  No more feeding, changing, nap, etc schedules. In reality, it's still the same - with the exception of the changing thing, only with more attitude.  

Daughter A has finished  high school but is taking an extra class at a local adult learning center to upgrade before heading to university, works basically full time, and like any teenager has a social life.  Sounds like she's pretty much got it together, right?  Nope - the only thing that keeps her on schedule is me.  

Her shifts at work vary but it's usually midnight's and with that she could start at 11 pm or 3 am until 7 am.  Then comes home in time to change, hopefully eat, and get to class for 9 am.  After that it's either hang out with friends or do her homework.  Depending on the day she could come home to sleep for a couple of hours before going out, then coming home to sleep again.  No matter which way it goes it up to me to make sure she's up for whatever is going on.  

I wish she'd wake up for an actual alarm clock but not a chance.  Every one we've ever bought her, she manages to turn off and/or sleep through it or she doesn't even turn it on.  Yes, she's that dead of a sleeper.  I don't know what to do. She's going off to school next year and I don't how she's going to manage. I feel like I've failed.  It's not like I can even let her screw up on her own.  These are the things you can't be late for or miss entirely. Sigh.

Last night is a prime example of my life.  She was scheduled to work at 3 am and asked me to get her up at 9.  I proceeded to go down at 9, and then continued hourly until 2:30 am - the absolute, very latest she could sleep. Even after getting her up I still didn't get to sleep to closer 3:15 because she was running so late that I had to switch the cars around while she got ready.  That wouldn't be so bad, I am naturally a night hawk, except I have to be up at 6:30 to get Daughter B up for school and I was falling asleep at midnight because the previous night was basically the same. This Mommy is running on 2 hours sleep a night!  I know I could take a nap during the day but that will only screw me up completely. I would end up sleeping all day and being up all night.  Getting out of that habit is way to hard - so this soldier marches on; even if only half awake.

Daughter B's schedule is like any other 14 year old.  School, homework, friends, the occasional after school activity - pretty normal...thankfully!  When she decides to get a job I just might lose my marbles because I don't how I'll manage keeping track of them both and sleep.

Do you think is pay back for having such an easy time when the girls were born because both of them slept through the night almost right away?  Seems like it.

Stay Sweet!

Tammy

Best Friend Birthday Tribute

I met my best friend, Jenn in 9th grade.  I remember the day perfectly.  I bumped into my then bff and her in the hall going to the cafeteria.  We chatted for a few minutes when she brought up that her finger felt naked because she'd forgotten to put on the ring she wore every day on that morning.  I don't know really the conversation swayed that way but it did - the cosmos had a plan..... I happened to be wearing a ring that day and wasn't particularly attached to it.  It was cheap and left a green mark if you worn it too long but I handed it over without a single thought - with the warning of potential green marks.  And the rest was history.

Today is her birthday. I can't believe that one little cheap ring started a 25 year relationship.

We've been through everything together.  I think I realized she was something special when I was going through the worst break-up of my life. I won't get into the details of the break-up but it was pretty bad.  I really, truly loved this boy and he ripped my heart out and tromped on it.  When I didn't feel like I had a friend in the world, she showed up and stayed with me for an entire week.  I still can't believe that our parents allowed this because school night sleepovers were completely against all the rules on both our parental sides.  We cried A LOT, we talked, and eventually we started laughing.  She made all my decisions for me that week.  It's a bit of a blur really, but she was my constant. I don't know if she knows how much that single act meant to me.

Never would have thought that I'd find a friend that is so much like me, it's scary.  We love shopping, taking pictures, reading, cooking, writing, the list is endless. Although I did question her brief cherry whiskey fetish.  No matter what interests me I know she's on board and I'm on board with her. We can sit in complete silence and never be bored.  Time and distance has no effect on us.  When she told me she was moving 3 1/2 hours away it broke my heart.  I was scared that I was going to lose her.  But nope - ties like ours can ever be undone.

I love her humour, her sincerity, her honesty, her intelligence.  I'm jealous of her beauty.

So, for your little look into the lives of two crazy ladies strolling down this life together birthday after birthday.....

The Biggest of Happy Birthdays Jenn!

Much love & stay sweet!
Tammy

Transplanted

Lady Cove Beach, Newfoundland

I moved to Ontario when I was nine.  My parents came here to provide a better life for me and my two sisters.  See, I was born in Newfoundland. Yup, a true Newfie.  Both my parents, all my grandparents and everyone before them since my ancestors took that huge leap of faith and crossed the pond from England - born on The Rock.

There's a joke that floats around that goes like this: "How can tell a Newfie in Heaven?....They're the ones that still want to go home."  No other statement in all of history could be as true as that.

You're probably asking yourself "Why? What's the appeal".  In all honesty I can't answer that question in a way that if you've never experienced it you'll ever understand.  There's a pull from your heart and your stomach that never goes away.  Sure it may subside a little but then you see a picture, hear a word, or get a wisp of something familiar the pull gets stronger and you'll want to immediately want to drop whatever your doing and go home.  Home. It seems funny to say when I've lived here twice as long as did there but that is what it will always be. . . . home.

See the picture at the top of this post?  I fell asleep every night to that view when I stayed at my grandparents house. There's nothing more beautiful than a calm sea, a full moon and clear skies.

A few years ago I took my family home.....We packed up the car, headed east, driving for three days.  It was a group trip with my mom, step dad, and sister in their car and the four of us in ours.  I distinctly remember coming up to the the causeway that attaches Nova Scotia and Cape Breton Island.  We all had our windows down and my mom calls over the walkie-talkie "Tammy! Can you smell that?".  She hadn't noticed my head was already hanging out the window.  At that point you smell the ocean.  The beautiful Atlantic Ocean! And do you know what the first thing I did a few hours later when we reached the ferry at North Sydney?  I grabbed my girls hands and walked them down to the shoreline, took off our shoes, stepped into the coldest water imaginable and told them 'This water runs through your veins'.

Luckily my parents have the opportunity to retire there.  They bought a ridiculous amount of land and built their dream house.  They just left last week from a visiting us. I miss them which is probably the driving force of this post.  Hearing about the cod fishing, boating conditions, the going on's of people I barely or don't even know has made me home sick. But mostly I think the is cause is listening to them talk.  My mom never completely lost her accent but I noticed it's stronger now than it's ever been. I lost mine shortly after moving.

You may have a place like this, somewhere your heart pulls you too.  You may never have called it 'home' but it's the place where your soul belongs.  If you don't, then find it! Newfoundland is where my soul belongs.

I think another road trip is in our future!

Stay Sweet
Tammy